It’s another June sunny day in Los Ángeles and I’m sitting next to fellow poet Ingrid M. Calderon-Collins and her husband, Painter John Collins. I’ve got a little buzz going on and we’re anticipating seeing who comes up next—not the next poet at an open-mic—but the next batter at Dodger Stadium. We’re here to enjoy a game between my beloved Dodgers and Ingrid’s favorite team, the Chicago White Sox, the team she inherited by way of marriage.

I’ve known Ingrid for almost a decade, but it seems that besides that one time I saw her at a bar, (where she was hosting a reading), the only other place I see her is at various bookstores when she’s reading or hosting readings. So, it’s nice to talk and be around her in a totally different environment.

Being poets, we focus on the small details of the game: the walk-up music players are choosing; which players are not even trying on defense; the amount of strike-outs needed for everyone to win a Jumbo Jack from Jack-in-the-Box.

Ingrid is goth. Ingrid is baseball. Ingrid is leaving the game early to beat traffic. Ingrid is someone who I think you should all meet!

That’s why I interviewed her and we conducted the interview via email. It has minor edits for clarity.

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Nikolai Garcia: You’ve been to both Dodger Stadium and Angel Stadium. What are some things about each stadium that you like?

Ingrid Calderon-Collins: I think as far as nostalgia is concerned; I love Dodger Stadium. It reminds me of my childhood, like it does to so many people here in L.Á. —I used to go there with my Navajo grandfather in the late 80’s. It was a family affair and it usually left me feeling so small in the big landscape of it. I loved that feeling. Now, it’s conveniently 10 minutes from my home, so that’s a beautiful thing too. Even though I’m not a Dodgers fan (GO WHITE SOX!) I’ve always had a fantastic time there because it’s so filled with wonderful memories.

Angel Stadium is not nostalgic, at all. The best part about going is the train ride there.  It drops you off right in the parking lot and you catch it at Union Station. The ritual is to grab something to eat and drink, get a little intoxicated before you go and ride the train away from Los Ángeles into beige Orange County haha. The fans there are a little more—ummmm, what’s the word? Proud.

Dodger Stadium feels like home. Angel Stadium feels like a rental.

Garcia: Why don’t they sell pupusas at Dodger Stadium?

Calderon-Collins: Honestly, I think because they’d have to hire pupuseras and they’d have to pay them more than they already make and that could be problematic haha

Plus, you can’t just hire anybody to make pupusas, you must have your seasoned pupuseras to do the job. They’re too busy on the streets trying to build community, not be stuck inside a huge stadium. I mean, have you tried frozen pupusas? HORRIBLE. 

Garcia: You stepped away from the public side of the poetry community for a couple of years. In however comfortable you are in answering this, can you get into why you felt the need to step away for a while? And then why did you feel the need to return to the public arena (because it seemed like you were doing fine working on various projects on your own)?

Calderon-Collins: One of the last poetry readings I was featured at was on February 27, 2020, for my memoir, “Let the Buzzards Eat Me Whole,” which you were part of, thank you so much for that. After that, the world changed, as you know. No need to harp on that. During those two years, I embraced being a hermit and wrote several books through an independent press (RESURRECTION press) I started with John, my husband. Pretty soon after that I also started an online magazine (RESURRECTION magazine), which has published close to 200 distinct voices since its initial launch. I did all of this from the comfort of my home, and surprisingly I enjoyed it and grew into a beautiful solo endeavor.

My then 86-year-old father was on his deathbed with covid, sepsis and pneumonia. This incident became the catalyst on reacquainting myself with my spiritual path. By some strange and beautiful miracle, he’s still alive and thriving, (those Aquarius men I tell you) but soon after, I began intensive study and meditation paired with fasting and therapy with a Jungian analyst.

I also started doing tarot as a vehicle for self-realization and as a tool to help others on their own unique path. I’ve been reading tarot since I was 16, but it was never something I let on or spoke much about because it was sacred, and it was mine. It wasn’t until we were all faced with ourselves that I got the calling to offer it as a service to people who wanted to take accountability and heal since we had been given the pause to.

The world felt so fragile and so did I. I knew I wasn’t ready to face the world in the form I was in internally so I did myself (and people who would be around me at a later time), the favor of coming back to myself in a way that would help me embrace conscious self-reflection.

Two years of spiritual jobs where I became a crystal practitioner, professional tarot reader and a devout student of Paramahansa Yogananda allowed me the wings to understand that resilience is just another word for “nothing left to lose,” & that everything I need to know, I already know. I am the question and the answer.

Once the world began to open up, I was hesitant about stepping out. I think I went inside so deeply; I didn’t know how to re-emerge. So, I sat with myself and wrote tons, “graduated” therapy after two years and felt like I had gathered enough weaponry to face the world again without so much disdain.

I promptly made up my mind about putting myself out there again without fear and with a new fresh perspective on life and just like that, the universe gave me the opportunities…

Garcia: When you came back with your new open-mic, Serpentine, it was received with great fanfare and anticipation, and continues to have a big crowd every month. What do you attribute this to?

Calderon-Collins: Jen from Book Show had closed her store in December of 2019 and that meant my open mic “They’re Just Words,” went silent as well. It had a run of three years and got a cult gathering. It was a precious time filled with tepid wine and dim lights. I reminisce so fondly on those nights still. So many voices and gorgeous tortured souls made their way into that matrix. I missed it dearly.

Right before the world had her metaphorical ending, I was working at Skylight Books as an offsite bookseller and event host. Then by June of 2020, I was unemployed. My stay there was brief, but I met incredibly kind, intelligent and talented people during my time there—fast-forward to the day after Valentine’s Day 2023, right when I got ready to face the world again, I get an email from Mads Gobbo (my former manager at Skylight Books) asking me if I’d like to host a poetry night at her beautiful new independent bookstore in Highland Park, North Figueroa Bookshop.

It was so nostalgic to be on the same street again, only a few blocks away from where Book Show used to be.

So, I announced it on my sad but mighty social media platforms and the beautiful cult of people I spoke of previously, came through without missing a beat. I was as hungry as they were to see and share a space together again.

I must also hand it to the events manager Addie and the booksellers at North Figueroa Bookshop for amping up the night every chance they get. We see new faces every month and the night inspires everyone to write something new for next time.

I attribute its success to my cultivating integrity and warmth. I want people to feel held and comfortable when they’re there. I create a womb. I want to give whatever thing they’re deficient of a safe landing place, so that we can all, congruently end up capable of filling our own cups, while simultaneously healing old battle wounds. That’s the hope anyway.

Garcia: While we’re on the topic of open-mics: What do you like about curating an open-mic?

Calderon-Collins: For me, it’s always been about creating a space that feels good for me and anyone that walks into it. I love hearing new voices, and especially when it’s their first time ever being at an open mic.  

How do you decide when someone would be a good feature?

Calderon-Collins: That’s a loaded question because I’m not going to put myself on the frontlines like that lol, but I will say that they must light a fire in me and have something relevant to say. When I first started this, I wasn’t as picky, but once I got a feel of what I wanted to put out there, I was able to energetically draw in more of my own kind.  

Garcia: What do you think are some of the unspoken rules of an open-mic that people are never told? 

Calderon-Collins: Don’t read over your time. Read less to leave people wanting more. Please don’t use poet voice unless you absolutely have to. That’s it. Just read the fucking room mostly.

Garcia: What advice would you give to newcomers so that they won’t bomb at the mic?

Calderon-Collins: Try sitting as an audience member first to see if that open mic is for you. Sometimes the vibe might be off and the people in there are not your people, etc. Just take stock of the environment and energies filling the room, and once you’re comfortable bring your stuff and be respectful.  

Serpentine occurs the first Friday of every month (except when they’re on Summer break). Contact North Figueroa Bookshop to make sure it’s on the schedule. To find out when Resurrection Magazine has a new issue or is open to submissions check their twitter @MagResurrection, their Instagram @resurrection.press or their website resurrectionmag.com